I constantly see across the internet, and have to listen to the drivel of pot doesn't harm you. "Hey man, pot killed 0 people so f off, Legalize it dude". But what you all don't get is the chronic is the most hidden detrimental drug in the known universe and it is a plant. Not of our species.
Let me tell you a tale, a fable so dark it will be your grandma hot. I got an invite to a movie party at a friends house one weekend. I scored some dope pot earlier that month from a guy in the bathroom at a minor league baseball game. I said, "hey I always luuuvvvv movies when I am stoned". Did I mention this friend lives 2 hours away driving time. So I have to fill up gasoline, I figure just in case I break down, I play that scenario more than once in my head while I'm there. By the time I leave the store I have 10 lottery tickets (because I kind of want to be that guy that they find the dead body and he has the winning lottery ticket, the wtf moment of the week you know), 2 baked potato flavored pringles cans, gummy worms, twizzlers, a bag of jelly beans, and a 6 pack of Mikes Hard cranberry. Everything just in case.
I'm in the car 2 hours (45 minutes is backwoods shit). I feel like I am Mr. Toads Wild Ride, and those trolls scared me when I was 9. I get there and boom the paranoia hit. I don't know if everyone can smell it on me. I like to wear husky, hooded sweatshirts. and sweat pants so sue me. But this time to be classy I put these jeans on I got from mom that didn't fit my dad no more. For some reason they are much tighter than I remember. In my dazed state I decided nah it would be fine. That could be another problem. Their two dogs go crazy after smelling me, uh oh, were they previous police dogs, are the police here?!
Then it starts. I gorge on food and I don't know if it's obvious what I'm doing. This guy always cooks way too much. He plans for 50 and only gets 10 type person. It doesn't stop. There is that urban/true legend that if you keep giving a beagle food it will eventually eat itself to puke/death because it won't stop. That was me. Everything was awesome. The courses kept coming, sushi, nachos, mac and cheese with hamburger helper, peanut butter ice cream cake then those chocolate covered pretzels cause the chick works for Nestle. Basically the pretzels = popcorn, it was always available along with tortilla chips. They also served ribs that he had been slow-roasting all afternoon between the 4th and 5th movie. I hate fucking Andy Warhol, what a sham. I also finish all the food I brought because sweet, sugary snacks and loads of them do nothing but good to your GI system, especially when you eat a pound of ribs.
It is now the 3rd day and I haven't felt like eating. I went boa constrictor that night/day I might not have to eat for a damn week. It doesn't feel good. In my life time, my personal goal was not shitting for eight days, but i had the help of pain killers, and my aunt's Buttered Hen soup which looked like clam chowder. This might over due it since it was all done over 7 hours. 7 days of eating in 7 hours. Remember that movie Jacob's ladder.
But all in all it was a pretty fun night. I saw the Brothers Bloom, and Little Children for the first time, solid movies, maybe the 2000's in film wasn't so bad. We have to admit they tried to add a lot of new things during those years, I think it turned out for the better. I mean should we not count the excitement up until seeing it as part of the entertainment, I was . Still cheap comparatively.
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